Monthly Archives

December 2015

Awareness of Sensation, Embodiment, Emotions, grounding, Meditation, Mindfulness, Silence, Soul, Spirituality, Whole Body

In 2016? Resolve to do more of nothing + more loving.

I’ve long been suspicious of the popular tradition of setting New Year’s resolutions. I see a profit-driven mass media stoking people’s fears and insecurities and using marketing tactics that exploit our vulnerability by getting us to feel bad about ourselves and to invest in self-improvement products and memberships. It can amp up the frenzied and fast-paced tendency to seek for satisfaction from external goals or by trying to live up to unrealistic societal ideals of adventure, fitness, balance, or beauty.

On the other hand, there is something inspiring and powerful in the ritual of resolutions. That so many people are focusing energy and attention on intention at the same time, can fuel our own motivation and support us.  How do we set goals that bring us into more of a sense of our own power and wisdom within? How do we trust we are moving at our own perfect pace and keep encouraging ourselves to love ourselves when things are hard or we mess up?

I am totally thrilled to have assembled a group of awesome women to support one another in our goals through my women’s whole wellness group that starts meeting online on January 1st. And I love list-making and box-checking from my to-dos. But the 2 most important tips I want to share for the arrival of 2016 are not about what to do but more about what not to do.

2016open

  1. Do not be hard on yourself! Please be kind, remind…yourself of how much you’ve done, how far you’ve come. Validate your feelings. Cheer yourself on and note successes. Do not use resolutions to beat yourself up, to judge or criticize yourself, compare yourself, or feel like a failure. Discouraging thoughts, harsh judgments when you fall off track do not help–they harm! They do not help motivate or change your behavior for the better. They do not come from a place of love or heart. Anytime you catch yourself in a hateful or mean thought about yourself, your emotions, energy level, progress on your goals, press PAUSE and take 3 deep belly breaths. Put your hand on your heart and offer some supportive and gentle words–to the part that let you down AND the part that is disappointed. The disappointed part has a message and a fear–acknowledge and love it. But remember you are much more likely to meet your goals and live up to your vision when you live from a place of compassion for yourself.
  2. Sit and do nothing. This is a quiet kind of courage–of going against the grain of our culture and the pressure to accomplish lofty, amazing, magical things in the new year. Believe that what needs to happen will happen–and with much more power and clarity behind it when you are moving from a centered and calm body, spirit, mind. It is brave to sit with ourselves quietly–5, 10, 20, 30 minutes a day, because when are just present to our experience without phones, friends, netflix, music we begin to FEEL the extraordinary sensations and emotions that are happening within us. Sometimes these can feel uncomfy, overwhelming, frightening, ungrounding, or giddy. Can you sit and BE and allow with the gentlness of holding a baby. Feel that icky feeling move through you as you would attend to an infant, vulnerable, innocent…maybe the infant is shitting on you and crying and screaming…how do you hold and be with an annoying baby? Curious to know their needs? Understanding their discomfort? Listening for cues of how you can help? Compassion for their suffering? Be with yourself like you would be with a baby. Set a timer. Monday 5 minutes, Tuesday 1o, Wednesday 15, Thursday 20, Friday 25. Can you go up to 30 on the weekend? Breathe, listen, feel, and be.

 

Celebration, Emotions, Gratitude, grounding, Joy, Power Within, Soul, Winter

Skip the Eggnog. Drink in the Gratitude.

(okay, you can have eggnog, too)

For those of you who don’t know, I collaborate on a project with a community of fabulous ladies called The Coaches Table. Each month we tackle a topic and invite you to share your thoughts and reflections, as well, to create connection and meaningful conversation. The holiday season has been quiet over on our Facebook page, but hopefully this video will start a bit of end-of-year discussion.

The topic for December: Gratitude.

When remembrance of loved ones who have passed, family stress, holiday expectations, or sugar crashes get you down, call in gratitude! What are you grateful for?

 

Celebration, grounding, Intention, Life Coaching, Life Path, Love, Meditation, Silence, Soul, Transformation, Whole Body, Winter

welcoming winter soulstice

Today, the winter solstice, the shortest day of the year, the darkest can be an invitation into our own dark corners and hidden places. We can shine the light by asking ourselves questions we may have been too busy to consider while caught up in the continuously busy pace of our lives. We can honor the gradual return of the light that begins tomorrow and we can celebrate the gifts and wisdom of what lives in the dark.winter-mood-113325_1920

Here are some ideas for a soul-filled solstice ritual:

Set up a quiet sacred space where you have privacy and carve out time for reflection. Find a cushion or blanket to sit on, a timer, and paper/notebook and pen.

Bring in energies that ground you into your space such as healing stones, crystals, plants, found objects from the earth.

Light some candles. Turn out electric lights. Thank the darkness.

Ask for support, wisdom, and guidance from your highest self, your ancestors, the life and spirit around you.

Sit in meditation for 5-15 minutes, comfortable and relaxed yet awake and engaged.

femJournal on the following questions:

  • Think back to a year ago, in winter, what space were your heart, body, and head in?
  • What were some memorable experiences in the past year and how did they affect your heart, body, head?
  • What space is your head, body, heart in now?
  • What does your head, body, and heart need from you as you move from dark into the light?
  • Pick 3 people–alive or passed–who can support you in life or in spirit, as you move forward. See them with you. Write down what they say to you as you call on them for guidance.

Create an intention moving forward and blow out the candles as you hold this promise to yourself in your heart and mind.

In the coming days, review your intention and meditate daily to bring more power to this solstice ceremony.

Celebration, Gratitude, Joy, Life Coaching, Life Path, Personal Growth, Self-love

Your Year of Being Awesomely You

Yeah, yeah…we might could stand to exercise more, eat less sugar, and live more in the present. I am all for setting intentions and creating more time to honor our soul’s priorities. This is why I am gathering a group of brilliant women-identified women to come together and support one another around body, mind, spirit wellness. We start with the new year–there will be daily offerings and encouragement on your journey–whatever your goals may be! You can join us by sending your email address to me. Message me at lionessasoleil at gmail dot com. I will send an invite when our Google + group opens at the end of December.

That being said, I am officially encouraging you to stop with the list making and resolutions for now. Take some time and look back–not on what needs to change for the new year, but what went well and how much you rocked in 2o15. And, I have some fun exercises to get you started. My gift to you.

www

Let me know how it goes! Send a snap shot of your completed certificate and I’ll celebrate with you!

Awareness of Sensation, Balance, Freedom, Life Coaching, Life Path, Open, Personal Growth, Self-love, Silence, Soul, Transformation

My body is here…

feet on earth.

My breath is still here, however shaky or uneven.

I’ve surprised myself by not getting totally freaked out at having no steady work or predictable paycheck. I’ve stayed calm when it comes to my financial future and getting the rent and bills paid.

That doesn’t mean I’ve stayed calm and serene this past month–and it’s been exactly one month since my last day of 8-5.

At first, I had things to focus on: GRE studying, applications for grad school, a busy holiday week taking care of people’s pets, including a chihuahua who bit me and a mutt who is scared of everyone and pooped in her crate the first time I went to walk her.

But as life quieted, pups calmed down, and to do lists were checked off, emptiness entered. And so did doubt. And a billion questions I hadn’t had the time or space to sit with in the past 6 years of full-time employment and busyness.

Anxiety and panic rushed in, fluttered around my chest, tightened my body, twisted my insides. What am I doing?spinnedbloom

I am still spinning. I have to remind myself. My feet remind me; my breath reminds me: I am here. I am okay. I feel a call to grow, to move, to shake up the way I’ve been living–and more pressing–the ways I’ve avoided living. The ways I’ve stayed comfortable or asleep.

What is stirring inside and coming through me still feels far away, amorphous, unknown. I am trusting that everyday, the small choices I make from inner guidance and soul growth, will reveal to me where I am next needed, and what I will be doing.

I wrote in a letter to a friend today: “I’ve made it a problem on some days, but today I am okay not knowing what is happening or where I will land when the spinning stops.”

What grounds me: as mentioned, stopping to notice my breath lifting my chest and exhaling through pores. Pressing and feeling my feet on the earth. Also, being with my dog and getting swept up in the transcendent and sensual power of music.

It’s normal to grasp for clarity and answers, to want to tell a story about our growth or learning…but there is also room for “I don’t know” and “I have no idea!” There is a time for trusting that soul is guiding you where you need to be. When there are no words for your experience nor a tidy narrative for where you’ve been and where you are going, find what works moment to moment.

I say this prayer to myself. Let me open to life, to the mystery of it. Instead of hiding and retreating in fear, or panicking and flailing in reach of something solid, may I face the risks of being 1000% in my life. May I feel the freedom and possibility of creation that follows the emptiness and endings and may I trust that I will arrive when my soul is ready.

May you trust your soul growth, as well. May you allow it to lead you into new and sometimes uncomfortable places. Have the courage to be true to yourself.

chogyamquote